Don't trust someone who has it all together. The post could really end right there if we really wanted it to, but I think we all know I'm going to elaborate just a little bit more. That's the appeal of putting the main theme at the beginning of the post. It lets all of you "click, read one sentence, close" internet users get the main point of the post before we lose you to pictures of cats, but it also gives space for the rest of us to wade into it. I think I learned it from a class about writing for newspapers.
No one in the world knows how poorly you have it together better than you. You know that. I know that about myself. We get to see ourselves in the mirror. We get to lie with our own thoughts in bed at night. We know our worst spots. We could point to each of them and connect the dots to form some kind of bizarre constellation. We know us. Very few other people do.
But some of us, the ones we want to be, let those cracks show. Not all of them, and not with just anyone, but we're vulnerable. Approachable. Relatable.
Then there's another type of person, always made-up, always composed, completely made up.
You'll recognize these people in a few ways. They'll often find themselves better than certain kinds of things - humor of certain varieties, discussions of select topics, etc. If you try to engage them in any of this, they'll recoil, composedly of course, and find a way to change the topic.
Another is that emotions you try to share with them will bounce off like sponge cake off of a brick wall. It's not that they don't want to sympathize with you it's just that how could they? I mean, honestly.
They don't even share any of theirs with you. The things you know about them you've heard from other people or picked up on your own. Everything is primped and polished over, but you've still picked up on a few things along the way.
I don't write this with any particular person in mind. I may not even mean this as a criticism of the people who are composed. What I mean to say is, the people who let some of their imperfections show, especially when they had the choice not to, are the kinds of people you can trust.
Because really, no one has it all, everything, one-hundred-percent together. So how could you trust someone who does?