On Choking

I just sat here for 15 minutes, looking at the blank "Add New Post" Wordpress page. It became pretty obvious that I had nothing. I still don't. So let's talk about that. Quite frankly, my readers, I don't exactly live the kind of life that makes a blog necessary. I don't travel the world or eat outlandish foods or experience a lot of things outside of the ordinary existence of each of us. I get up and write some mornings, I go to work with a dreadfully long commute, I come home and lose myself in a TV show or movie or video game.

It's perfectly average.

And I'm not going to say that's the beauty of all of it. It seemed like that's where this post was headed, and it could have, but I don't think that's what I want to say. Most days, I can't find the beauty in the necessary. Most days, the average, the norm, the daily, is out to destroy me. Most days, I let it.

I bet if I looked into it, those would be the days, and the days surrounding them too, that I find myself looking at a blank page for longer than I find myself writing. I bet if I kept digging, too, I'd see that it's exactly like I said. That the real problem isn't the sometimes mundanity. That doesn't have the power to stop me from writing. Instead what stops me is this – I let it.