I Really Can't Write Women

The last post was intended to be a joke. A kind of commentary on my history with women and how that can inform my writing. In this post, I'm going to take a little bit of a different approach. I'm going to tell it to you straight. I really can't write women.

I know what you're thinking. That sounds exactly like what I said last time. There's a reason for that. Sometimes, the truth is said in jest. I'm terribly afraid that all of the female characters I write are going to be flat and shallow and boring, or even worse, offensive. I don't want to be responsible for setting back gender relations 20 years.

I just don't know how to handle writing them. Guys are easier to write, if you ask me, but when you think about it, there's really only one thing a guy wants. It sounds shallow, but it's true. It's probably biological or something, that we want to further our species and our family line and all that, but I think it has a lot to do with women being really pretty and stuff.

I know guys. I get them. I just don't know what makes women tick. I can't imagine it's the same thing.

So please, if I have a female reader out there, tell me how to write your kind. I'll be eternally in your debt.