Dear Netflix

Hello. I'm one of your streaming subscribers. I use the word "streaming" to distinguish myself from the probably 4-6 people who still subscribe to the physical discs that you mail. They must not have internet where they live, huh? Anyway, I've noticed something I think we need to address. It's the descriptions that you have for episodes of TV shows. Usually, they're just a little bit humorously off, like describing just the opening scene of an episode or something like that.

I ran into one a few nights ago that really gave me pause. I took a screenshot so we can talk about it.

Screen Shot 2014-05-07 at 9.49.01 AM

The first part of that description is great. That's exactly what happens in the episode. It's the central conflict, if you want to look at it that way.

The second sentence doesn't happen in the episode at all. Nowhere. Not a bit. When Norm does Sam's taxes, he finds that Sam should be getting back $15,000.

So not only do we have an issue with different monetary figures being expressed (and off by $15,000 too!), but your description seems to express that Sam owes money when really what happens is he's owed money.

That's not even close.

Now I'm sure the guy you've got writing these things is a great person. I'm sure he really enjoys watching the first seven minutes of everything and then writing up what he's found.

But this one, this one shows he's not living up to his end of the bargain anymore.

So, consider this my formal application for the job of watching your TV shows and writing the brief descriptions. If there's one thing time has told about me, it's that I'm more than qualified to A). watch TV and B). describe things that happened on said episodes of TV.

I'll be expecting your call.

Michael Ulrich