Day Twelve, Word Count: 30,023

If there's one thing I wish I could do, but will probably always be too scared to try, it's slam poetry. I spend whole days looking up poems on YouTube and being thoroughly moved by this form of artistic expression. These people have a grasp of language in a way that I doubt I ever will, and it makes me jealous, but also really excited that words can be put together in such creative ways. Here's probably my favorite example. I watch this every few days to remind myself of why I love writing.

I don't know how that relates to writing a novel. It really doesn't. I just wish I could write poetry. My poems come out sounding like a rejected Nsync song, which is roughly the equivalent of a Backstreet Boys song. Not only did that paint a picture in your mind of how bad my poetry is, you know now on which side of the fence I fall in the boy band wars. Useful.

I've been using my parents Wii Fit this week. Apparently my BMI is fine, but it keeps telling me how off-balance I am. And it's true. I feel off-balanced, and not just in the standing up straight sort of way. I'm doing my best to be happy, but it feels like the odds are stacked up against me. What odds? Well, that's part of the problem. I have no idea. Nothing's going wrong. I think it's just that nothing's going anywhere.

Writing helps. It makes me feel like I'm having some sort of forward momentum, but it's just writing for me. That's what makes it so easy, but sometimes it feels a little silly too. I'd like to know my writing will get me somewhere some day. Has anyone checked the back of the book for the answers of how this all turns out?

Regardless of if you don't know where this is all going, I'm sorry if my ... off-ness has made me less than fun to interact with. I promise it's not you.