I'm writing this post on my first day of my new job. I had forgotten when I was supposed to show up this morning, so I got here a half an hour early, so I get to sit here and try not to look like I feel out of place for now. It's not so bad, really. I just always feel uncomfortable being the new guy. The flip side of that is I'm the new guy. I have a new job. A job that actually lines up with what I spent four years in school learning. That's a feat, I think. It feels like an accomplishment after working two months at a restaurant, at least.
Here's the problem. I can't quit the old job. I need the money to do silly things like pay my rent and eat. While this new place couldn't be better in terms of work, it might end up being for a minimal amount of pay for a while. The only reason that's discouraging is that I have to pay for things. I'd be fine with doing what I love for free if I didn't have to do what I don't love to pay for the time I'm doing what I do love.
Whew. It's a mess just writing about and the thought of living it isn't any more fun. It's not that I hate my restaurant job. It's just an inconvenience, taking my nights, my weekends, my patience, a little of my dignity. It's hard to believe in the goodness of humanity when people aren't even willing to tip you fifteen percent.
But for now, I'll be glad. I have a job that actually fits me. Maybe it'll work out, and maybe it won't, but through all of this, I'll always have my work. This blog. My scripts. Personal projects like that.
You know, ones I probably shouldn't be doing on my first day of a new job.